(PUC-RJ)
LIES ARE SO COMMONPLACE,
THEY ALMOST SEEM LIKE THE TRUTH
Everyone lies. Little lies, perhaps, which may not
cause serious problems, but still they are lies. We fudge on
how old we are, how much we weigh, what we are paid. Some
people tell their children that Santa Claus will come on
Christmas Eve.
Consider the last time you got a phone call from
someone you didn't want to talk to. Did you perhaps claim
falsely that you were just on your way out the door? That your
newborn (you're childless) needed you?
Did you ever promise anyone, "We'll do lunch", when
you knew that you'd never get together?
Did you ever reach for the phone to call in sick to
work, then leap from bed to enjoy the day?
Did you ever tell someone you owed money to that
the check was in the mail when it wasn't?
Few behaviors serve as many purposes as lying. We
grow up to use lies - or at least half truths - to avoid things that
should be done, to get people to believe us, to get what we
want, to buy time, to end conversations, to keep relationships
going.
"Lying is also exciting," said Margaret Summy, a
professional counselor in Forth Worth, Texas. "It's living
dangerously. Besides, we all want to be important, so we
change our stories to make them more interesting."
"We also lie to make people agree with us, without
realizing that we're doing so," said clinical psychologist David
Welsh.
"In working with relationships such as parent-child or
husband-wife, each person has a different memory, one
which helps them. They'll accuse each other of lying," he said.
"But both are telling their own understanding of the truth."
Perhaps the most understandable reason people lie
is so they don't hurt others' feelings. Most guests at a dinner
party wouldn't want to say that they didn't like a specially
prepared meal, even if it was terrible.
But even though people lie for good reasons, lying
can be harmful. If we act on false information, we can be hurt.
If we lie and are discovered, it can destroy the trust necessary
for strong relationships. Besides, lying is hard on the brain
because one lie leads to another, and we always have to
remember our false story. In his "Discourses on Government",
Algernon Sidney said, "Liars ought to have good memories."
For most of us, though, lying is hard on us physically.
We breathe faster, our hearts beat harder, and our blood
pressure goes up.
The truth can be hard on the body too, of course —
especially if we're admitting to a lie. Just about the most
difficult thing for any human being to do is to tell others that he
or she lied to them. It's very stressful.
Terry L. Goodrich. Seattle Post-Intelligencer;
October 29, 1990, C1
The modal auxiliary "ought to" in "Liars ought to have good memories" (lines 42) indicates...
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