Howmany soldiers do you see ?
Less than 10
Between 10 and 50
A lot more than 100
Russian girls are...
A good exportation product
Vladimir Putin meets cosmonauts.
He says : "Americans walked on the moon. We will do better. We will walk on the sun next year".
A Cosmonaut says : "But, beloved President, we will burn. The sun is too hot !"
What did the President answer ?
"Are you sure ?"
"It's a capitalist's lie !"
"You are a cheeky coward !"
"Our engineers already found solutions to all the problems. We will land at night !"
When you hear the words "Karl Marx", at what do you think ?
I don't think. It's too dangerous.
I think at the theory of materialism
I think at Groucho Marx
What was the nationality of Adam and Eve .
Russian post made a new stamp with Putin's picture. But you never see it on a postcard. Why ?
Because people always spit on the wrong side
Because Russian people are too poor to buy stamps
Because you need a special authorisation from FSB to buy such stamp
What is the difference between 1 Euro and 1 Rouble ?
There is no difference, comrade
The rouble is precious : you find it only in Russia and it's not easy to find
In Moscow, in a restaurant a young Georgian guy looks at his new university certificate.
Where does it come from ?
It's a false document
It's a real and legitimate document. He passed real exams
It's a stolen document
Which image do you prefear ?
Which one of these sentences is true ?
When the President goes to the restaurant... It's the server who gives a tip
The President is the only human having a bible with an autograph
When the President pee against the wind, the wid changes direction
The President already counted till the infinite. Two times !
When Google does not find, Google ask to the President
The President is so powerful, he makes onions cry
Which of these images gives a good idea of modern Russia ?
A russian father sits at the kitchen table. He is drinking vodka.
His son comes home and says " Father, vodka is more and more expansive. Does it mean you will stop drinking ?"
What answers the father ?
No son. It means you'll have less to eat.
No son. It means you'll have to work.
Russian cars have warming wires on the rear windshield. Why ?
To heat hands when you push them
To defrost the windshield
To copy Lamborghinis