Deborah Tannen

Slide 1

• Summarised “You Just Don’t Understand “ in an article

Slide 2

• Status vs Support
• Independence vs Intimacy
• Advice vs Understanding
• Information vs Feelings
• Orders vs Proposal
• Conflict vs Compromise

Slide 3

• Men - conversation is competitive
• Women - gain confirmation and support for their ideas

Slide 4

• Men - focus on independence
• Women - closeness and support

Slide 5

• Men - a complaint is a challenge to find a solution
• Women - women empathise and understand

Slide 6

• Men - conversation conveys information
• Women - conversation expresses emotion

Slide 7

• Note : the giving of information and brevity are considered of less value than sharing of emotion and elaboration

Slide 8

• Men - prefer direct imperatives
• Women - suggest people do things

Slide 9

• Men - enter into conflict
• Women - avoid expressing opposing views

Slide 10

• Note: we assume male is the norm and women are expected to change, but if they do so they’re accused of being unfeminine/rude/bitchy (Dale Spender).

Slide 11

• Men - get more airtime ; speak in public ; negotiate status ; speak one at a time ; speak asymmetrically.
• Women -talk too much ; speak in private contexts ; build relations ; overlap ; speak symmetrically

Slide 12

• Cooperative overlap =/= competitive overlap =/= interruption

Slide 13

• High involvement speakers - concerned to show enthusiastic support
• high considerateness speakers - more concerned with being considerate